The devastating news

"Dr Ng has gone back already. If this is the case, can you come to the Emergency Ward tonite and call for Dr Ng? .... Otherwise, you can come to the night clinic. Dr Zo will be on duty."
The nurse has been very helpful and courteous too. She has arranged a slot for mom with Dr Zo at 7.40pm.

Mom needs to get a second opinion. The bleeding hadn't stopped since 11am and mom had since prepared for the worst. Ryan insisted to tag along with us to the hospital but mom refused to take Ryan along. "Ryan will have to stay with grandma and grandpa until papa and mom come back, ok?"

We arrived the hospital 10 mins late due to the traffic jam especially after office hour. However, there were not many patients at that time and infact, we were told to enter Dr Zo's room rightaway. After getting a short briefing from mom, Dr Zo did a thorough ultra sound scanning on mom. "This black round image is the water sac. But I can't see any life baby inside. There's big possibility that you are having a miscarriage with the amount of blood that you are discharging. Since there is no life baby, I'm not able to give you any injection to stop the bleeding. Rest at home. If the bleeding is heavy, come back. But if it's like your normal menses, then it's ok. I need to see you in two weeks time."

When we reached grandma's house, Ryan asked how was baby. Mom could only tell Ryan that baby has been very very sick and need to go to a place very very far away from here.
"But where?"
"Up to the sky, Ryan. To be a star."
"But why? I don't want baby to be a star." Ryan began to weep and tears rolled down his cheeks.

Grandma carried you to mom's car while mom placed your schoolbag in the back seat before we leave for home with Papa leading from the front.

The journey back home that night was filled with sadness. It was never this way before. Ryan's daily "drive home with mom" routine is always a joyful one. With Ryan in the car, mom's car stereo has long been reserved for Ryan and mom is never allowed to play any other grown-up songs (except for those that Ryan fancied), nor even switch to radio stations. Only nursery rhymes and children's songs are being played on mom's car stereo. But, never had mom got frustrated or bored with this before as mom has been appreciating and enjoying Ryan's every notes humming and songs singing ever since Ryan was one year plus.

"I don't want baby to be a star. I have to call the fireengine to take the star and crack it and let baby fly down to the ground, mommy", Ryan uttered angrily with tears in his eyes.
"But, the star is very very far from the earth and no one can ever reach the star, Ryan."
"I will ask the "Starman" to take it for me, mommy."
Mom had no idea how to respond to Ryan. Mom regretted telling Ryan that baby turned into a star. Ryan just couldn't take it. The news have been more devastating to Ryan than mom. As soon as we reached home, Ryan burst into tears and cried his heart out. Ryan was inconsolable for almost half an hour and mom's heart was shattered into pieces. Mom did not expect this to happen. Mom could only hug Ryan tightly in mom's arms.